I have no patience with myself. I fail to give myself one idle minute. I fear I would die of emptiness if ever faced with an hour to myself. There is no way I could live through so much time on my own. How would I know?
I keep making my busy days busier.As I make lives of those around me easier and fuller, I find sincerity do a number on my sanity. Yet I thrive on the goofy pride. Sometimes, when I try to draw attention to what new I made or how I made old better , my enthusiasm meets with perfunctory hums and haws. A little too late, ” it is nice.” I break a little every time but pull myself up too. Ever had everyone in the house look forward to breakfast and being baffled staring at the stove top only to put a decent meal on the table a half hour later?
This blog began and I thought I could bring something new to it everyday. Here I am struggling, barely swimming sitting past midnight to somehow post a little something. It has been two weeks I did that last. Pulling an all nighter each time I have to.
I started painting again.It just happened and I can’t stop. To embrace a long-lost love fulfills the incomplete me. It let tears out I did not know I had. It tells me I am not going to die of emptiness. It says an hour to myself is just what I need. Most days will not allow me that, but the nights will. For now, I don’t care if I lose a little more sleep. Two things there be, I am not letting go – this blog here and painting. Not this time. Not again.
Because I am happy , I am happy to share!!
Here are a few wallpapers, all either complete or parts of my recent work. Set them as your phone lock screen. I hope they will bring you some cheer!
Feel free to download, THEY ARE FREE!download a few
Here's a basket-full !!
walk through the field
take home a sprig
download loveliness here
Some more sunshine